This is my first time, okay? Actually getting help with my learning. Not just in this program, but people now, I didn't have the help back then. That's wrong, as an adult now, I should have got it a long time [ago], because I didn't have that stable thing. They didn't ask me questions. That's why I didn't end up telling them anything. Sometimes kids don't even know how to approach them...

You're supposed to focus on not just one student in the class who's doing something, who's getting their work done. You guys have to focus on the ones who are not doing what they're supposed to. (Natalie Jones)

Another student, who did receive a range of "help," was also clear that she needed to be asked directly what was wrong. The lack of this question led her to a firm belief that nobody really cared:

Everyone kept asking "Why don't you like school?" Nobody asked why I was having a hard time. I didn't not like school, I just didn't want to be there. It made me feel ill. No one understood it made me feel ill. I think it's that child saying "I have the flu, I can't go to school today," but I really felt very sick to be in the environment. The smells made me feel ill, made me feel dizzy. Public school, I think, above high school was more traumatic, because I just remember all the students always staring at me and not coming near me. And the teachers being okay with that. Like, no one ever said "You need to play with Jennifer, don't talk to Jennifer in that way." (Jennifer Hogan)

Some students did say that even if they had been asked what was wrong, they would likely not have told because they did not want to split up the home, betray their parents, create disruption for siblings, or because they did not believe that reporting would lead to a better situation:

They told me [they wouldn't tell anyone else], but it's the fear that when they say it's abuse, they have to call Children's Aid, whatever. And personally I didn't care whether I was taken out of the house, it was fear that they would take my brother too...He was being treated fine, I was the only one that was actually being physically abused...My little brother is really attached to them. (Andrew)

Other students said they would have told (or on occasion did actually tell) if the right person had asked, in the right way, at the right time. In particular, what seemed to make a difference to students was that they had the opportunity to build a relationship with a teacher and see that she or he cared, believed in their potential, and was genuinely concerned about what was wrong.